What's the capital of Iceland ? - About $ 3.50
How do you define optimism? A banker who irons five shirts on a Sunday
Why have estate agents stopped looking out of the window in the morning? Because otherwise they'd have nothing to do in the afternoon
What's the difference between an investment banker and a large pizza? The pizza can still feed a family of four.
What's the difference between an investment banker and a pigeon? The pigeon is still capable of leaving a deposit on a new Ferrari.
The credit crunch has helped me get back on my feet. The car's been repossessed.
Latest news: The Isle of Dogs bank has collapsed. They've called in the retrievers.
What do you say to a hedge fund manager who can't sell anything? A Quarter-pounder with fries, please.
You know it's a credit crunch when...
· The cashpoint asks if you can spare any change.
· There's a 'buy one, get one free' offer - on banks.
· The Inland Revenue is offering a 25 per cent discount for cash-payers.
· Your builder asks to be paid in Zimbabwean dollars rather than sterling.
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